'A passion for intimate waxing'
'A passion for intimate waxing'
Innerbeauty. The eye-wateringly straight-talking salon.
Hello 👋
When I help brands find their tone of voice, I use my Voicebox method. (You can, too.) At the heart of it is the idea of the 11 Primary Voices – the foundational styles of brand writing: Simplifier. Firestarter. Neutralizer, etc. Blend them together in endless ways to create an infinite variety of voices. Some combinations turn up frequently. (Warm Friend + Simplifier). But others are extremely rare. One of those is a Sensualist + Straight-Talker combo. Like, what would happen if a luxe beauty brand talked like Ronseal?
Well, wonder no more. Cos yesterday, @Anna_D_Scott
shared this on Twitter. It’s the salon Innerbeauty in Frome, in the southwest of England. And it’s an absolute doozy. Let’s pay a visit.
Things start innocuously enough. Standard salon-y vibe. ‘On the cobbles’ is a little quality marker. I don’t know Catherine Hill, but I know cobbles usually mean ‘the old, nice bit of town’. (It’s a pleasing word to say, too. Cobbles.)
Their ‘services’ page is similar. More calming vibes. These don’t seem to be stock pics, so it must be the actual salon. Deep velvets and that hint of amber light. A bit Soho House. Lovely.
Then innerbeauty introduce themselves:
They’re ‘friendly’ and ‘professional’. They offer a ‘range of beauty and holistic services’. All good so far, nothing out of the ordinary. There’s the faintest hint of something in the last phrase ‘…having a passion for intimate waxing’. Intimate waxing isn’t typically something people have a passion for. But then the word ‘passion’ does get bandied around a lot these days, doesn’t it. It’s probably nothing.
And then. And then. You click on ‘intimate waxing’ and this happens:
Wait wat?! 😳 BAM! OMFG. I did NOT see that coming!
First off – the change of pace practically gives you whiplash. It’s the SURPRIIIISE! of walking in on a surprise party. It’s biting a strawberry and realising it’s a chilli. It’s when cartoon characters do this:
Then! The Sir Mix-A-Lot energy of ‘we love a good set of pubes, we ain’t gonna lie!’ The sheer glee of no such thing as a “too-hairy minge”. The bish-bash-bosh of ‘so it will be knickers off, no need to be shy’. I love that they feel the need to say ‘nothing will shock us’ – WE KNOW! WE CAN TELL! You’ve just said pubes, hairy minge and sticky knickers within the first 30 seconds of meeting you!
I’m reeling. It’s *amazing*. And I am already in no doubt whatsoever – they really do have a passion for intimate waxing. Onwards. Next, they talk a bit about their approach:
It just keeps coming. Who doesn’t want glitter on their bush when their pubes are being removed!!! I have never thought about this before but I find I am in total agreement. And I don’t even care about the three exclamation marks!!! Which is supposed to be a copywriting no-no!!! But is totally working!!! Because this isn’t ‘copywritten’ – this is someone who clearly bloody loves their job and knows their shit firing party-poppers of joyousness right into your face.
‘We also love a good ingrown hair or two so be prepared for us to dive in… it’s a pleasure and perks of the job!’ This is spectacular. Every other beauty salon in the world is at great pains to make it all about you. At innerbeauty, you’re there for them, too.
It’s basically like if Sarah Millican and Dr Pimple Popper opened a salon together innit.
Right. Now there’s some FAQs:
I particularly like ‘we are fast, keeping you talking about random, useless crap’. Glad they got bush in there. (In the imaginary tone of voice guidelines in my head, one of the principles is summed up with this little rhyme: ‘A bush, minge or crack in every paragraph!’)
OK. I’m totally sold. What are my options? Here’s the price list:
‘Butt crack not included’ might be my favourite line from any product descriptor ever. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever heard BUTT CRACK said so many times in such quick succession. Goldie’s ‘the lot gone, bald’ has an austere descriptive power that Cormac McCarthy can only dream of.
Finally – just a quick shout-out to their cancellation page, which has exactly the same no-nonsense energy. There is NO WAY I’m messing with these guys:
I love the whole thing so much. I love its unselfconscious confidence, its total exuberance, the pleasure it takes in the down-to-earth language. I love that it does not care what you think. I love that it’s ‘body positive’ without ever needing to say so. And I love that it’s a reminder that if you do anything with enough energy and confidence, you can make your own rules.
Three things to wax lyrical (sorry) about:
🙌 You do you
This sounds blindingly obvious, yet small businesses often miss it. If it’s your business and you’re writing the stuff, use your own voice. Don’t waste a second worrying about ‘sounding professional’. You have a superpower compared to larger organisations – you can say exactly what you think, as boldly as you like. (We could call this Butt Crack Professionalism.)
😁 Enjoy it
Standard marketing advice is to focus on what’s in it for your customers. What are the benefits? How do you want them to feel? This is all good and right and proper. But, well, if you just reeallly enjoy the details of your job, there’s great power in letting rip (ouch) about that. Innerbeauty are clearly experts at intimate waxing – we can tell cos of how they go on about enjoying an ingrown hair. (Let’s say this is The Pimple Popper Principle.)
💥 Bam!
I don’t think I’ll ever forget clicking through to their intimate waxing page – that mad rush of unexpected energy. We’re often obsessed with making a tone of voice consistent and congruent across a whole brand. But once in a while, hit the afterburners and melt everyone’s faces. (You can call this what you like, but I will forever think of this as Big Bush Energy.)
Butt crack butt crack butt crack
.See y’all next time.
More on this next time. ‘All models are wrong, but some models are useful’ said George Box. The 11 Primary Voices are, I hope, a useful model.
@Anna_D_Scott posted it, and @_joejeffries gave me the heads up. 👍
It has belatedly occurred to me that this newsletter is probably gonna trip just about every corporate firewall. Oops.